MissLead

Dear Harriet,

Lately, all of my friends (all of whom I respect) have all had differing opinions on the same matter. It's not even so much what the situation is so much as it's confusing me that everyone seems to have a different suggestion in how to handle it. The people-pleaser in me wants to follow all of their advice, and the conflict-avoider in me wants to take none of their advice.

But I respect and love all of these people! How am I supposed to know who's advice to follow?

MissLead



Dear MissLead,

I've got some troubling questions for you this time.

1. Are you sure that all of them are your true friends?
2. Are you sure they're all giving you Godly advice?
3. Are you willing to spend less time with them if they are "bad company"?

While this situation may be a "gray" area, I have to say it isn't very likely that four opinions are all four right opinions.

Have you prayed about it? What does God say? What do your parents say?

Put your emotions aside for a moment (or longer, depending on how thick-headed you decide to be!) and think about this critically. Is it even a question that needs to be answered? Is their any action that you need to take? And if so; take it! Stop avoiding it!

And while we're on the subject of avoiding things, stop avoiding conflict. While it's good to be a peacemaker, and wrong to stir up dissension, it never helps to put off something that needs to happen. It will most likely make things worse.

You know I'm right.

And finally, remember what you just read. Peter says "above all, love one another fervently"

Start thinking about what real love, true love is. And then add a fervently onto that. Simply concentrate on loving God. Then devote yourself to loving your brothers and sisters in Christ fervently. I think some problems of your "problems" may just solve themselves.

Harriet